Our default setting is either "Do what has been done to me" or "Do the exact opposite of what what has been done to me if I didn't like it". Coaches are a perfect example of this. Coaches tend to coach how they were coached (if they liked their coach) or they coach the exact opposite if they were coached by someone that was a "bad" coach. The same is true with teachers, parents, etc. We copy our positive experience or overcompensate by doing the exact opposite when the experience is negative. It is true with any relationship as well. We attempt to express love to others in the way that we want it expressed to us. We attempt to show appreciation to others in the ways we want to be appreciated. The fact is that true love is meeting the other person's needs, regardless of what you feel is what they want. God wants our acknowledgement of Him and our obedience. He isn't too impressed by words that are not supported by action or actions without the proper intentions.
Lord, help me to know You better so that I can properly show my love to You.