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COACH Toby Schwarz
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Compete WITH and Not AGAINST!

3/24/2021

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There are a lot of great reasons to help others.  Unfortunately, helping others is often seen as in opposition to helping ourselves.  "If I help others, then I am taking away from my own prosperity.  I need to focus on "me" so I can maximize my efforts".  And when it comes to a choice, we usually choose "me" over "we" and definitely over "you".  Obviously, having the mentality and the heart to put others first is a desirable characteristic.  However, if that is too much to ask, then look at the research.  Motivation is one of the keys to personal success.  When we are more motivated, we are more likely to repeat desirable behaviors (like working hard, putting in time and effort, giving our best). Research shows that the greatest untapped source of motivation is a sense of service to others; focusing on the contribution of our work to other people’s lives has the potential to make us more productive than thinking about helping ourselves (Give and Take by Adam Grant).  It makes sense.  Most people struggle with confidence, doubt, fear, anxiety and depression because they are focusing too much on themselves and not looking more at others.  The more we are "inward focused", the more we get caught up in our failures and weaknesses and have a hard time seeing our strengths.  In contrast, when we help others, we see that life is more than our own selfish desires and that life is more than just about us.  So when you find yourself falling short of your own goals and hopes and dreams, then take your eyes off yourself and spend some time to help others so that they can reach their goals and hopes and dreams, and you may find that you both end up winning in the end.
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