All Pain Is Not Equal!
I was an 800m runner. I realized at one point in my running career that the approximate two minutes of physical pain experienced during an 800m race was nowhere near as painful as the emotional/mental pain I experienced when I gave up, didn't push hard enough, or wimped out during the race. That lesson carried over to nearly every aspect of my life. The pain of writing a 186 page Doctoral Dissertation in less than three months was well worth the sacrifice and "pain" compared to the pain/worry/anxiety of stretching out the process or procrastinating over a longer period of time or possibly never finishing the dissertation at all. "The pain of discipline is far less than the pain of regret." Sarah Bombell
Life is Hard!
"Excuses are for Other People" Joe Galli CEO and Executive Director of Milwaukee Tools/Techtronic Industries
Fact: Life is hard.
Fact: Sometimes life is harder than other times but that doesn't mean that life is ever easy.
Fact: Comparing our life to others' or to our "best life" is not helpful for anyone.
Fact: Embrace the challenges of life, realize that they make you stronger, rely on others to help you, understand it will take longer than you anticipate, and you will find that you will have a much more improved life.
"Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit." Vince Lombardi
Let's face it, accidents happen. Car accidents. Spills. Pooping our pants. We've all been there (or will be or will be again). Life is full of accidents but not all accidents are created equally. We sometimes find ourselves on the positive end of an accident. Maybe we don't call them accidents. Luck? Being at the right place at the right time? Coincidence? Blessings? Good things happen to us sometimes without our involvement. However, for any sort of consistent growth and improvement, we must be intentional. We can't simply wait and bank on the hopes that we will improve by accident. "Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change." Margaret Thatcher
Can't Eat Just One!
"Betcha can't eat just one" is a slogan that made a lot of money for the Lay's potato chip company. Think about it. Have you ever just eaten one potato chip? Just one? Just one kernel of popcorn. Just one M&M. Just one bowl of ice cream? (ok, that is my issue, not yours). Our limit is usually more than one in a lot of things in life. Hit the snooze button for just one or 7-9 more minutes. Just one more game before we stop playing. One more pair of shoes. One more new electronic gadget. One more to fill me need, want desire. Unfortunately, we don't allow ourselves to have that same mindset when it comes to the challenges of life. One is all we think we can handle. We seem to believe that our limit is one and one only. Only one trial at a time. Only one attempt at a solution and then if it doesn't work, I am done. I can't do more than one. Often times, we need more time and patience to get through a tough challenge. We also need to allow ourselves the grace to have that time. When our expectation is only "one" then we don't give ourselves the ability to adapt to a failure and we put too much pressure on ourselves to be perfect the first time. Life doesn't work that way. "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it." Margaret Thatcher
Compete WITH and Not AGAINST!
There are a lot of great reasons to help others. Unfortunately, helping others is often seen as in opposition to helping ourselves. "If I help others, then I am taking away from my own prosperity. I need to focus on "me" so I can maximize my efforts". And when it comes to a choice, we usually choose "me" over "we" and definitely over "you". Obviously, having the mentality and the heart to put others first is a desirable characteristic. However, if that is too much to ask, then look at the research. Motivation is one of the keys to personal success. When we are more motivated, we are more likely to repeat desirable behaviors (like working hard, putting in time and effort, giving our best). Research shows that the greatest untapped source of motivation is a sense of service to others; focusing on the contribution of our work to other people’s lives has the potential to make us more productive than thinking about helping ourselves (Give and Take by Adam Grant). It makes sense. Most people struggle with confidence, doubt, fear, anxiety and depression because they are focusing too much on themselves and not looking more at others. The more we are "inward focused", the more we get caught up in our failures and weaknesses and have a hard time seeing our strengths. In contrast, when we help others, we see that life is more than our own selfish desires and that life is more than just about us. So when you find yourself falling short of your own goals and hopes and dreams, then take your eyes off yourself and spend some time to help others so that they can reach their goals and hopes and dreams, and you may find that you both end up winning in the end.
Success is not simply based on what you do correctly. Success is most often based on what you shouldn't do or what you don't do that you should. "Good habits are important, but it's often our bad habits that prevent us from reaching our full potential...you're only as good as your worst habits." Amy Morin
"Teamwork is the only way to reach our ultimate moments and create breakthroughs that define our careers and fulfill our lives." Pat Riley
We seem to be fascinated by Superheroes. Hollywood makes a lot of money based on this fact. Many idolize heroes based on their courage. Courage only exists when risk is involved. There aren't a lot of movies made about a person who sits in their basement all day playing video games and posting cat memes on Instagram. But put Dwayne Johnson on a Skyscraper with no plot and we rush to the theater. We admire heroes not only for what they accomplish but for the risks that they take to achieve those accomplishments. Life should not be reckless. We are not called to run aimlessly into oncoming traffic and hope that we survive. We shouldn't risk injury or death. But life is not meant to be without risk. We must take risks to achieve our full potential. Playing it safe will only get us so far. Risk requires trust and faith and confidence. Risk requires us to understand that failure isn't the end of the world but instead, failure is a sign that we at least tried our best to reach our full potential. Today is a great day to be a Hero. Take some risks that allow you the opportunity to either succeed or failure.
Dropping An F-Bomb!
This may be the first Mental Tip you actually read, simply based on the title. Coaches spend a lot of time telling athletes to "Focus". The problem is that coaches are telling and not teaching focus and most athletes don't know actually what focusing means. Focusing refers to "attending to the task at hand". Instead of talking about focus, coaches and athletes should spend more time discussing the elimination of distractions. I repeatedly warn students to not study in their dorm rooms. There are too many distractions. Besides the normal college fun that can get in the way, even tasks like laundry are more attractive and tempting when confronted with the chore of studying or writing a paper. I encourage students to go to the library ... alone ... and find a quiet floor/room/corner where no one else will see them and then only bring with them the one or two books that they need to read or the notes they need to study. Eliminating distractions is the first step to focusing. The same advice can be used for many areas in our life, including training. Only bring to practice those things that will allow you to be successful at practice (positive attitude, excitement to improve, coachability, the desire to be uncomfortable, work ethic, mental toughness, etc) and leave all of the other things (school, worries, social life, lack of confidence, distress, laziness, comfort, financial issues, etc) behind in your dorm/apartment/house. There is enough work to be done at practice that we don't need to bring extra distractions. And you can spend the other 22 hours of your day on those other things that you left in your living space if you want. They will be there later if you still want them. "What sets disciplined people apart? The capacity to get past distractions. Focus on the task at hand." Bill Parcells
"Busy" is Not All Equal!
"Being busy does not always mean doing real work." Thomas Edison
COACH. FATHER. HUSBAND. SON OF THE KING. WHITWORTH UNIVERSITY.